Hello, my name is Regina Mae, and I am a dating site addict.
I admit it. I love dating sites! Every time I log on, I either find an interesting man to talk to, or a funny story to tell my friends!
Why dating sites, you ask?
I’m forty-something and newly single after twenty-five years of marriage.
I live in a small, Southern community.
I work ten hours a day most days and travel somewhere, (anywhere), most weekends.
I want to date single, available men but don’t trip over very many of them in my day-to-day life.
What’s an incredibly busy, newly single dater to do?
I considered taking out a full page ad in the local paper.
(Can’t you just imagine my ad? “Gently used heart available for wooing.” Or, “Hey, y’all, Regina Mae’s single! Somebody please ask her out, for heaven’s sake!”)
Somehow, dating sites seemed like a more economical way to find single men!
After viewing hundreds of profiles, I’ve noticed a few commonalities in the good profiles, and the bad.
My fellow dating site adventurers, here are my top eight hints for catching funny, intelligent women:
1. You get big points for truth in advertising! Be who you say you are. Be honest about your age, height and marital status. I know it’s tempting to present yourself as younger, taller and fitter than you really are. Lying about yourself is the worst way to start a relationship. And this is the catch: if you lie, I will figure it out. If we meet, I will realize you are 5’5, not 5’9 as stated in your profile. If you lie about something that isn’t evident by looking at you, I will still figure it out. (Day time job = attorney.) And then I will tell everyone. (Night time job = blogger.)
2. Current pictures are a must. If you post pictures of yourself from ten years and twenty pounds ago and we eventually meet, I will think you have self-esteem issues. (Although I will be semi-impressed with your willingness to delay rejection until it comes face-to-face. I am not that brave! I prefer rejection from a distance.) By the way, if you’ve been on the same site for more than a year, it’s time to update your pictures! Pictures should be representative of who you are today.
3. Interesting pictures get my attention. My favorite so far? A picture of a man with a huge smile lighting up his face, riding a camel. It was interesting enough for me to email him to ask about the story behind the picture. We ended up dating for four months. Have you been sky-diving? Swimming with sharks? Traveled to foreign countries? Those kinds of pictures will make me want to get to know you. And they will give me an excuse to email you! Pictures of you doing something fun or exciting, looking like you’re having a great time, are always better than the bathroom self-portrait!
4. Choose your most attractive pictures. If your picture is or looks like a mug shot, you probably want to change it. Unless you’re going for that market! (Some girls dig convicts. Just not this girl!) If you’re sitting slouched on your couch in a way that emphasizes your double chin, bless your heart. Sit up straight, stick out your chin and take a new picture! If all else fails, follow the advice of Patti Stanger, the Millionaire Matchmaker, and pay for professional pictures.
5. Age appropriate requests get the best responses. If you’re young enough to be my child, we are not going to work out. On the other end of the age spectrum, if you’re old enough to be my daddy, I’m not interested. Most websites have a place to list what age range we are comfortable with. If you’re outside that range by a year or two, go for it. If it’s more like a decade or two, don’t waste your time or mine, please.
6. If you’re bitter because your ex-wife left you, get counseling. Then come back and try again! We all have issues. Divorce can be devastating and heartbreaking. If you’re still dealing with the pain of being left, you are not ready to be dating yet. Not even cyber-dating! Now is the time to deal with your journey of forgiveness.
7. Humor gets as many points as honesty. Your profile is the perfect place to show off your sense of humor. I will look at your picture first. But I’ll review your profile before doing anything else. If your profile makes me laugh out loud, I will want to meet you! Even with the best pictures in the world, if your profile is a dud, I will not want to talk to you.
8. Spell check. Spell check. Spell check. (I cannot say it enough.) If you don’t care enough to proofread your profile, why should I trust you to care enough to take care of more important things some day? Nothing turns an intelligent woman off more than a poorly worded profile pockmarked with misspelled words. In this era of auto-correct, there’s no excuse for mis-spelled words. They make you look like you don’t care enough to present your best self.
I’ve looked at hundreds of dating profiles. I’ve seen profile pictures that looked like so much fun I wanted to be in them! I’ve read incredibly well written profiles. Post interesting, current pictures. Write a funny, insightful profile. Then see how many funny, interesting women make themselves available to you!
Question: What catches your eye on dating sites? Give me the good, the bad and the beautiful!