Archive | October 2012

my balanced life (or my broken heart beats)


I’ve never understood how a heart can be broken and still keep beating.  And yet, here I sit once again, heart broken and still beating.

Carrie and Herman Wandall

Checking Facebook is mindless and automatic.   Glancing past the inanities of our every day life as a way to pass the time, fill an overactive mind always seeking new information.

Sometimes buried in the food porn and relationship updates, I stumble across life-changing, heart-breaking news.

Hello Family and Dear friends,

Our dear Carrie will not be with us as long as we would like. Please send your love, visit, call, send a note or what ever way you would like to show Carrie your Love. Thank you all again for all that you have done for Carrie and I. We are both eternally grateful for all your love and support. Love to all Herman and Carrie

Herman and Carrie, who personify Sufi poet Hafiz’s “A Love Like That”.  Carrie, who has fought so valiantly to beat ovarian cancer.  Carrie, who will not be with us as long as we would like.

Carrie standing in the surf

Last time my heart was broken, Carrie healed me. Saved me, really. I wish there were a way to return the gift she gave me.

Heal her, save her, the way she did for me.

I have a hard time imagining my world without Carrie.  Without yoga classes and healing Reiki sessions.  My world is different, I am different, for having met her, for having spent hours in her yoga studio.

Carrie’s love, her legacy, will live on. The lives she touched will touch others, passing on her legacy to all we touch.

Carrie had a way of blanketing people in love and peace.  In my darkest, most painfully heart-broken days, I knew if I could just make it to her yoga studio, I’d be okay.  I’d survive another hour, another day.  Even when I was too beaten to do anything but child’s pose, life was better if I could just get there.

Now it’s our turn to send a blanket of love and peace to cover Carrie as she finishes her journey on earth.

Our turn to cover Herman with a blanket of love and peace as he says goodbye to his love.

Heart broken but still beating.

adventures in dating (or come over)

I love country music. Handsome country artists sing songs of love and wanting.  They beg me to come over, come over, come over.  They let me know how much they want to make me feel wanted.

Kenny Chesney's Come Over

When Kenny Chesney sings, it feels like his lyricist spills my life onto sheet music.

We don’t have to miss each other, come over

We don’t have to fix each other, come over

We don’t have to say forever, come over

You don’t have to stay forever, come over

Hunter Hayes sings of making me feel wanted more poetically than any man I’ve dated.

As good as you make me feel

I wanna make you feel better

Better than your fairy tales

Better than your best dreams

You’re more than everything I need

You’re all I ever wanted

Luke Bryan knows the words I long to hear.  When he sings about how he doesn’t want this night to end, it reminds me of all the nights I didn’t want to end.

Jake Owen tells me, I know it would kill me if I fall, I can’t be alone with you.  And it makes me want someone who’ll fall for me.

Josh Turner and Keith Urban make me believe in forever.  Chris Young makes me fall in love every time he croons another line.

I love country music but it’s killing my love life.  These handsome crooners set the bar high.  Higher than the men who’ve touched my life so far.

When I find a man who can sail over that, I’m keeping him.

There’s a want and there’s a need

There’s a history between

Girls like her and guys like me

Cowboys and angels

Hey, cowboy.  You’re angel’s waiting.